“30 Minute Mozzarella Recipe”.    30 minutes my ass.

The kids are watching a smidge of classic Sesame Street while I sip tea, post a blog and regain some sanity before serving dinner solo.  It’s been a long day.  I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t smoke and it’s moments like these where I pause to wonder if I will in fact get through their youth without any illicit or addictive sedatives.  Addictive other than two cups of tea a day anyway.

Bottoms up!

Also known as: Two big pots of nothing useful if I cock it up, which I may well do… Geez why am I such a masochist, why didn’t I just do the laundry that needs doing instead.  What does the baby have in it’s mouth now, where is my son…steam but not bubble for two hours are you freakin serious…

To this:

Also known as: Three days of juicing, slicing, melting, stirring, steeping and waiting for the curd to form with my breath sucked in….and finally a HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF, we’re done.

Now the marmalade needs to sit for a couple of weeks to set properly and the cheese needs to be salted, air dried and turned until I wax it and let it sit in my cheese cave (laundry room) for a few months.  (Of course I saved some curds for instant gratification).

And now I get to clean up.

And I just went to reset my timer only to realize that the next step for each needs to take place in one hour.

(Oops.)